Le tour de France

No he drunk to much whisky

Nohjis wrote:

NLSP wrote:

Nohjis wrote:But Yellow is the color of piss

Corrected it for you

Jealous much ? By the way are you from Mars ?

yes I am
any problems with that?

hmmm....Are Martian entrants allowed?

Don't think so.

I always thought Lancie was extra terresterial, so i don't see why not.

I'm pretty sure that is a disqualifier.

I think NLSP should be banished from all sport events in eBelgium. He's the shame of our country !!

On the other hand, this is the Tour de France. Maybe they would be proud of him.

I think critically that there are 2 types of sporters who get a lot of attention:

1. the best
2. the funniest.

So for the exposure of eBelgium, I'm willing to catalogue NLSP under 2.

Start in Lorient today. After blood and urine tests is prooved that NLSP isn't from Mars, but just has a small alcohol addiction.

Once again Cotarius is in the leading group, but this time El1temkd joins him.

The reason Cotarius attacked is clear: the climb of the côte de Laz. He takes the point for the mountain jersey.

Still no change at the supersprint. In the peloton Johny English A wins it. NLSP was slightly slowed down due to a manoeuvre of MaryamQ and loses some points. No penalty for MaryamQ, as she was following Johny English A.

Result:

1. El1temkd 20 4. Fhaemita Malodorous 13 7. Critically 9
2. Cotarius 17 5. MaryamQ 11 8. NLSP 8
3. Johny English A 15 6. Helviro 10 9. Nohjis 7

In Cléguérec (20km left), the peloton joins the leading group. In time for the final difficult 4km.

4km... The peloton is ready for le mûr de Bretagne.

3km... a slight downhill

2km... now it's climbing untill the finish.

There goes MaryamQ! That's way too early, but probably she tries to weaken Nohjis and to cut his lead in the general standings.

Fhaemita goes out of the peloton, joined by the early birds Cotarius and El1temkd.

1,5km... Critically and Nohjis are struggling! Nohjis gives his all.

1km... MaryamQ is on fire! She keeps up the fast pace. Only Johny English A and NLSP in her wheel... Helviro gives 10 metres.

500m... Johny English A can't keep up. Only a small gap, but it's probably enough!

And NLSP beats MaryamQ in the sprint! MaryamQ won't be sad, as Nohjis has still to come in.

Result:

1. NLSP
2. MaryamQ
3. Johny English A +5"
4. Helviro + 7"
5. Nohjis + 35"
6. Critically
7. El1temkd + 55"
8. Cotarius + 1'09"
9. Fhaemita Malodorous + 1'45"

Standings:

1. MaryamQ
2. Helviro +11"
3. Nohjis +18"
4. Johny English A + 31"
5. NLSP +1'04"
6. El1temkd +1'13"
7. Critically +1'29"
8. Cotarius +1'36"
9. Fhaemita Malodorous +3'06"

Green jersey:

1. NLSP 170
2. Johny English A 149
3. MaryamQ 134
4. Fhaemita Malodorous 130
5. Cotarius 117
6. Helviro 115
7. El1temkd 107
8. Nohjis 100
9. Critically 98

Mountain jersey:

1. NLSP 3
2. Cotarius 2
3. MaryamQ 1

JEAN-FRANÇOIS PESCHEUX’S ANALYSIS : Echelon country

“Like the previous stage, this one takes place entirely within Brittany with the setting on this occasion in Finistère and the Côtes-d’Armor. The stage heads from Carhaix to Cap Fréhel through spectacular countryside, with the final 70km alongside the sea. So, once again, the riders will keep an eye on the wind and be aware of the possibility that echelons might form. It will all depend on the weather, but there might be some surprises today. All things being normal, like the stage into Redon, this stage should be won by a sprinter.”

cooke4444 wrote:Start in Lorient today. After blood and urine tests is prooved that NLSP isn't from Mars, but just has a small alcohol addiction.

But, But, my mom always told me that I was her special Martian :'(

Congrats NLSP! and congrats MQ on winning the Yellow. enjoy it while it lasts.

NLSP wrote:

cooke4444 wrote:Start in Lorient today. After blood and urine tests is prooved that NLSP isn't from Mars, but just has a small alcohol addiction.

But, But, my mom always told me that I was her special Martian :'(

good fight today!

hmmmm.... alcohol ... definetly a reason to be... stoped by the France Police; they should do their job, right in the middle of the next stage

lol, french police
their only function is to convince an occupying country that france is always willing to collaborate ....

A fairly flat stage today, let's see if someone can beat the sprinters.

The peloton stays together today. Some will be hold back from an attack because of the firm breeze along the seaside.

This brings us to le côte de Gurunhuel. Cotarius attacks once more, MaryamQ follows. NLSP stays in the peloton: the supersprint isn't that far anymore. Cotarius is the first over the hill and takes hereby the mountain points. NLSP holds on to the jersey... today.Helviro closes the gap, as MaryamQ is too dangerous for him in the standings.

Supersprint now. No MaryamQ today... It's Fhaemita Malodorous who wins with some lenghts. But the other important sprinters are taking the 2nd and 3rd place.

Result:

1. Fhaemita Malodorous 20 4. Cotarius 13 7. MaryamQ 9
2. Johny English A 17 5. Nohjis 11 8. El1temkd 8
3. NLSP 15 6. Critically 10 9. Helviro 7

The race progresses slowly. No one is interested in an attack. Tomorrow will be an important day for the mountain jersey.

Suddenly only 3km left.

2km... I can see NLSP with Fhaemita Malodorous in his wheel.

1km... Attack of El1temkd! Can he round this off?

500m... Still El1temkd, the peloton keeps his pace.

400m... Fhaemita from a long distance! NLSP is surprised and gets caught behind Critically.

200m... Fhaemita and Johny are side by side, just behind El1temkd

It's Johny English A! Not a good day for NLSP, who loses lots of points in the green jersey standings.

Result:

1. Johny English A
2. Fhaemita Malodorous
3. El1temkd
4. Critically
5. MaryamQ
6. NLSP
7. Helviro
8. Nohjis
9. Cotarius

Standings:

1. MaryamQ
2. Helviro +11"
3. Nohjis +18"
4. Johny English A + 31"
5. NLSP +1'04"
6. El1temkd +1'13"
7. Critically +1'29"
8. Cotarius +1'36"
9. Fhaemita Malodorous +3'06"

Green jersey:

1. Johny English A 211
2. NLSP 205
3. Fhaemita Malodorous 185
4. MaryamQ 165
5. El1temkd 145
6. Cotarius 144
7. Helviro 140
8. Critically 134
9. Nohjis 127

Mountain jersey:

1. NLSP 3
2. Cotarius 3
3. MaryamQ 1

JEAN-FRANÇOIS PESCHEUX’S ANALYSIS : An opportunity for the puncheurs

“The Tour’s longest stage is not flat. Because we are in Normandy, the route is rolling. We will have to wait and see what happens with any breakaway riders. Although it’s not ‘a wall’ of 10%, there is a decent climb 1.5km from the finish in front of the basilica in Lisieux. Some good riders are sure to lose contact there because the peloton is bound to split apart. If a breakaway group is still clear, not all of them will be able to stay with the pace at this point. A stage profile of this type does not suit the Tour’s favourites, and certainly not a pure climber such as Andy Schleck, but will suit a puncheur. Once again, just like the finish on the Mûr-de-Bretagne, the qualities of a rider in the mould of Philippe Gilbert will come to the fore on a stage like this.”

My legs didn't feel good

NLSP wrote:My legs didn't feel good

It's a lack of stamina due to your alcohol problem I think.

well, I just changed brands, I stopped drinking Stroh 54 with my meals and only drink Blackwood's Vintage Dry Gin for the moment.
I guess that this could be the cause of my problems

damned I'm riding a pretty anonymous tour, time to get active.

where's my needle.


Accupuncture always helps the day before a tough race.

yeah sure, is the needle hollow and connected with a syringe that injects you some forbidden substances???

off course not.

If you can't see it, it isn't there.

So, can you see transparent products ?

I can

I see dead people, so i guess i can see transparent products too.

You two have "interesting" skills for cyclists.

i know, watch me

NLSP wrote:I can

Of course, how could a believer of the invisible pink unicorn not see it ?

I however also saw the invisible pink unicorn!
It came to me just before the prologue and told me that I should do a good attack, and I won that etappe

oops, so that was the thing i felt, i thought it was a pink speedbump.

damn you french and your weird traffic control system

lol mentioning french and traffic control system in 1 sentence

for me! finaly got one stage, with more to come ... legs were in great shape; told you i'd get that green jersey

Johny English A wrote: for me! finaly got one stage, with more to come ... legs were in great shape; told you i'd get that green jersey

it is critically's fault, he blocked me...

"les excuses sont faites pour s'en servir" (don't know it in English, except if i do a 'mot-a-mot' translation)

and, by the way, of course he blocked you... he's (secretly) on my team

:O

and I was thinking this was about fair play ...

This is a sports event... What would fair play have to do in here

eh, like everything!

Just talk I will be there when nobody expect me.

Dinan is the starting place today. The riders will have to use their hills skill on the way to Lisieux.

With some 3rd category climbs on the road, Cotarius is controlling the group. He ruins the attacks of Helviro and El1temkd, and so the complete peloton will climb la côte de Saint-Michel-de-Montjoie.
Cotarius attacks early on the climb and so takes the points. Critically takes one point.

Another superprint! This time in Vassy. Will NLSP get some points back for the green jersey?

Fhaemita takes first place, then it's a close call between Johny English A and NLSP.

1. Fhaemita Malodorous 20 4. Helviro 13 7. El1temkd 9
2. NLSP 17 5. Cotarius 11 8. Critically 8
3. Johny English A 15 6. MaryamQ 10 9. Nohjis 7

Le côte de Bourg d'Ouilly is once again completed first by Cotarius. He surprised MaryamQ there.

Le côte du Billot is for Nohjis. Nobody sprinted as the finish line is close. Less than 30km now.

3km... a final uphill. Not for mountain points though.

2km... Cotarius attacks! Everybody follows his lead.

1.5km... Less steep now. El1temkd with Critically!

1km... The sprinters are surprised. Fhaemita is having trouble to keep up.

500m... Helviro with a final attack, but Critically is already sprinting!

250m... side by side. NLSP and Johny are sprinting too

And it's El1temkd. That was very close!

Result:

1. El1temkd
2. Critically
3. Helviro + 2"
4. NLSP + 4"
5. Johny English A
6. MaryamQ + 6"
7. Cotarius
8. Nohjis
9. Fhaemita Malodorous + 12"

Standings:

1. MaryamQ
2. Helviro +7"
3. Nohjis +18"
4. Johny English A + 29"
5. NLSP +1'02"
6. El1temkd +1'07"
7. Critically +1'23"
8. Cotarius +1'36"
9. Fhaemita Malodorous +3'12"

Green jersey:

1. Johny English A 249
2. NLSP 248
3. Fhaemita Malodorous 219
4. El1temkd 199
5. MaryamQ 195
6. Critically 188
7. Helviro 183
8. Cotarius 162
9. Nohjis 150

Mountain jersey:

1. Cotarius 7
2. NLSP 3
3. MaryamQ 2
4. Nohjis 1
5. Critically 1

JEAN-FRANÇOIS PESCHEUX’S ANALYSIS : How will the yellow jersey play it?

“Today’s profile is the flattest of this year’s race and that will probably result in a victory for one of the contenders for the green jersey. Of course, the terrain decides the nature of the route, and in order to get to the Pyrenees from Normandy we have to cross an area where there are no real difficulties. Because of the nature of the stages that have been completed so far, the yellow jersey will not be on the shoulders of one of the race’s favourites, but it will still be in the possession of a strong team because one of those stages will have been the team time trial. It might perhaps be a Rabobank rider that has it, like Gesink, or an HTC rider, like Martin. But if they are truly determined on contending for the overall title they will no doubt want to pass it on to someone else as quickly as possible. But if someone like Gilbert has it, his Omega Pharma-Lotto team will do all they can to hang to it.”

Red is a nice colour.

JEAN-FRANÇOIS PESCHEUX seems wrong, MaryamQ is definitely a contender for the final victory !

damned, so close.

Still, I gained 4 seconds on MQ, which is nice.

sneaky Helviro

I'm catching up for the points again
It is just hoping that I don't lose to many points in this flat stage tomorrow, I like a few hills

yeah sure, an yellow powerranger that is an UCI doping inspector ...

Don't forget, he is also on the SC, so you might have a tough time with an appeal.